Devil Like Me

Gather 'round, my faithful council I'm down bad with a case of the blues, see I just took an L That's a tough look for Hell, old Lucifer don't like to lose It was a haul back home from Georgia Had my tail tucked 'tween my legs I never been outfiddled, but I'm damn well sizzled Man I went off like a powder king I know smoke was all he wanted Oh, he got it when he started to play And I'd just struck a bet that I'd come to regret Cause that mortal sure knew how to slay Have you heard this one before There's a twist to the story His instrument wasn't no fiddle (What is this) But he could make a man sing when he's playing that thing And that thing was nothing I would call little (Holy fuck) He said I'm no more an angel, than I am any friend to thee But I raise a hand to heaven You ain't ever met a devil like me, yeehaw Then I got to running like a hog for slaughter cut free Till I stopped and thought hold on He's not the devil, I'm me! I said "Son, I'm the Dark Lord, are you some impostor" He responded "Sorry, I just meant that I'ma monster" Rumble time, bitch, click, click, boom, baddy Papa Pocalypse Call me that or Doom Daddy Because when I'm dropping hits Even the Earth will move I've already put half the universe under my boot He was hardly one to battle Or I thought with all that prattle Come to learn he could walk the talk (So hot) From the barrel of his chest to the barrel of his best Gun, every part of him was fully cocked (Oh, God), he said I'm no more an angel, than I am any friend to thee Listen up, if you been sinnin You don't simply get forgiven for free I'll never be caught dead with a Halo But I wanna see you on your knees You can count me once Outdeviled, now I know how the Devil does it And he'll never do it better than me Now heed these words, all my dear demonkind This Doom marine came in a tomby thing with a lock that we got to find I've seen this man meet his maker Yet he stands the test of time A mean, green, lean protein, eating machine So overpowered that he's nigh divine Right in the face of danger did he place his wager But it wasn't for a fiddle of gold Now he sits on my throne And he can call it his own Cause that's what I bet against his soul (Goddamit!) He said I told you I'm good, better remember it well I took your kingdom But I can continue giving you Hell Go tell your demons soon I'll meet 'em if we haven't before Bye to the Devil you knew Hi to the Devil you don't Well, that's great, today's Satan's termination Got my job usurped by my worst creation A God-made man on a sacred campaign Making work of Lucifer like he's playin' a game Oh, how I've shamed myself letting him take my crown What else to do, but remove my horns Fuck it I'm takin' 'em off, see they were fake after all Cause I'm the Doom Marine of whom you've been warned I said I'm no more an angel, than I am any friend to thee If it's heating up in Georgia I'ma give the Devil more than just tea I'll never be caught dead playin' the fiddle But I fire up a BFG You can count me once Outdeviled Now I know how the Devil does it, and he'll never do it better than me (better than me, better than me, never do it better than me)